Phelps, Diana, Just Me and Granny
I haven’t been watching a lot of the Olympics. Just here and there. Granny has been watching a lot. But that’s what she does. Watches TV. Last weekend we did watch together when Michael Phelps made history.
It made me think about the fact that you never forget where you were or who you were with when you experience something on that scale historically.
I realize it’s just a guy (or at least half guy/half dophin) swimming faster than anybody else (over and over again) and it’s not a life-changing thing like the Kennedy assasination or 9-11. But because it was something that most of the world experienced with you, it’s the kind of thing you are likely to remember. Even if it takes something else to trigger the memory.
I say that because sitting on the sofa, just me and Granny, watching a major event happen half-way around the world took me back to when I was a child sitting on the sofa, just me and Granny, watching a major event happen half-way around the world.
I must have been about six or seven years old that summer. There were many times as a kid when my parents would deposit my brother and I at Granny’s for a week or so at a time during the summer. This was just one of many.
I always loved coming up to Granny’s house. It was always a more quiet and gentler atmosphere than home. Even my brother, who is the very devil himself, would be seduced by the country mountain setting and lay off me. Or it simply may have been that my Granddaddy kept him occupied.
This is not to say that Granddaddy showed no interest in me. It’s just that I was I was quiet and shy (and therefore constantly at Granny’s hip) while my raucous ferule brother was a better match for my gregarious grandfather.
Plus, Granny would do things like drop little balls of dough in my mouth like I was a baby bird when she made yeast rolls. Or let me have a little half cup of coffee, which I filled with milk and creamer to the point that I was drinking liquid candy ..with caffiene. (Ironically, I hardly ever drink coffee now. Maybe only if I go out to eat and have it with dessert. And even then it’s black with no sugar.)
That’s what we were doing that summer. Having coffee. Granny was having her usual morning mug and she poured a little bit for me. It must have been about five or six in the morning (I have never slept well..with our without caffiene) and Granny and I were the only ones in the house who were awake.
The sun was not fully up yet and we were cuddled on the sofa with our mugs of morning brew. History unfolded on the floor model television that served as a base for family pictures and illuminated the semi-dark room.
I remember asking Granny if they were going to show the birds and the mice. She didn’t understand what I meant. But, Disney had taught me that princesses have animal friends, so naturally I assumed that Diana would, too. And surely they would be at her wedding. She said that if there were any mice or any other animals there, they would be hiding in nooks and crannies and not mingling with the people. It made sense to me.
In hindsight I realize it was a genius response. She didn’t lie or pander to me or create some fairy tale mythical answer. But, she didn’t squash my childhood imagination either. She understood what it was about the event that held fascination for me. It wasn’t about a royal wedding. It wasn’t about history.
And now, as an adult, it still isn’t about either of those things. Even though I am now old enough to understand that the wedding of Prince Charles and Diana was a major event for the world, it’s more about how the event fits into our history.
Just mine and Granny’s.
August 24th, 2008 at 1:18 am
Being a bit older than you, I was in a different place during the Royal Wedding. And being partnered with an English Knight, my take on the events are a bit different — but I do remember that day fondly. I also remember her funeral. Very sad indeed. Watching her coffin speed past us as we stood on the street was most disconcerting. The crowd didn’t really know what to do or how to behave.
I’ve been fortunate to witness first hand a few world changing events, and it’s made me see clearly that we are all connected. That we are all one and that we should learn to forgive without condition, love without expectation, and live like there is no tomorrow.
I have nothing in my heart but love for you and how you have fitted yourself into my history. I’m a very fortunate man indeed to have had such a wonderful, albeit brief, encounter with you. I am the better because of it, and I thank you.
August 24th, 2008 at 5:47 am
I use to have coffee with my grandmother too at a very young age. Was during breakfast on the weeks that I would stay there during summers. Occasionally, I would be there during school time as well. I still remember how it tasted; for the life of me I can’t replicate that taste. Just so I could be just a little closer back to that moment.
August 24th, 2008 at 9:38 am
I only drank coffee for two weeks in the 90′s. McDonalds. I thought I’d see what the fuss was about. I thought it was too thick and gave it up. I’m a total tea person, and I usually have two cups a day no sugar no cream no milk. Usually green. It’s soothing. I questioned my mother the first time she gave me tea when I was sick. She said I’d like it. Lots of sugar. I didn’t, but things change.
As for Diana and her royal wedding I was a teenager when she married, and it was Eastern Standard Time and my mother kept popping in to watch and I was pretty disinterested. I was popping in and out as wel. As for her death, I was in a bar with Rick. We had just met for the most part. I always thought Diana was kind of a kook. But I thought it was nice, unlike her pairing with Charles, that she and Dodi seemed like a good match.
Now, as I used to post when I first started reading this great blog: one piece of fried chicken (breast) and a bowl of pasta with pesto (home made that I made last night…..fresh basil….awesome!) for breakfast.
August 24th, 2008 at 1:17 pm
Cutis captures my sentiments perfectly. For me, the mention of Diana reenforces the fragile nature of life for the rich and poor alike.
I was at a friend’s place in Miami when the news of JFK,jr broke and it validated my opinion.
Losing your voice will be difficult for me to accept because you speak to me in a very unique way. We are very different people, but we have so much in common. Be well and Go Vols!
August 24th, 2008 at 2:41 pm
Thoughtful and beautiful as always, Tony.
August 24th, 2008 at 10:11 pm
Very nice post indeed – but jeez, you wonder why your grandmother figured out you were gay?
August 24th, 2008 at 11:18 pm
Tony, this made me think of a story involving my own grandmother. I am going to recycle this as a post on my own blog. It is a story I have thought about for a while, and this is a good excuse to write it down.
I am going to miss your blog. But, maybe it is good to go out on top.
One of my blog heroes is Large Tony. He is going to retire soon, and will be missed.
He stays with his Granny in the hills of Tennessee. Today he was talking about the time when he was up at Grannie’s house as a young boy. They got up early one morning to see the wedding of Charles and Diana. I dare say the bond between them was more genuine than the bond between Charles and Diana.
I saw an earth changing event at my Gran’s house one day. ( And why do some people say Granny, or Nana, or Gran? Its not like I remember having a choice ). Gran lived in a little apartment in Mrs. Stuckey’s house on Virginia Avenue. This was a few years before Virginia Highlands was uber trendy. I was staying with her one summer day when I was ten years old.
We walked down to the granite house next to the golf course in Piedmont Park. One of Gran’s friends worked there. This was the summer of Beatlemania, and Gran’s friend made a point of telling me that she DID NOT LIKE THE BEATLES. ” If they were playing for free across the street, I would not waste the energy to walk across the street to see them”.
So Gran and I walked back to her apartment to see “As the World Turns”. Then, the show was interrupted for a news bulletin. Walter Cronkite came on the say that a North Vietnamese boat had fired on an American boat in the Gulf of Tonkin.
Now, we did not know at the time that this was a world changing event. In fact, I doubt Gran ever thought much about it. But our Congress used that incident… which turned out to be fabricated… to justify our sending many more troops to fight in Vietnam. And that war was a world changing event. We are still dealing with the effects of that conflict.
August 24th, 2008 at 11:55 pm
Very nice post.
August 24th, 2008 at 11:56 pm
This is exactly what I will miss when you ‘graduate’. This evocative picture of you and your loved ones, especially granny, experiencing and enjoying life together. Nobody does this better. Your tenderness and your wonder, and most of all your pervasive love, caring and enjoyment are such a pleasure. Thanks again for making me get outside of myself and at the same time in touch with myself again. You are gifted writer and a very sweet man.
August 25th, 2008 at 2:19 pm
I had an Alice in Wonderland teaset when I was little and on Sundays Auntie and I would get up before everyone else and have a “Tea Party” mine was mostly milk and sugar but to this day I remember the special treats that Auntie would magically make appear for our parties. (She got them from the lady down the street who was a british war bride and made the most wonderful sounding treats for all, I’m still the only person I know who loves cucumber sandwiches who hasn’t ever been to England)
The funny thing is we had a Tea Party the day Diana and Charles were married and we had “planned” one for the day she died in 1997, but that one got canceled…..
I’m going to miss you, Tony, if only for the fact that you have helped me remember the little things I adored when I was little that I had forgotten in all the daily grind and stress of being a grown-up….
August 26th, 2008 at 12:02 am
Floor model or plasma, that TV has changed our perception of reality. And puting Phelps, Diana, Granny and you in the same blog makes some kind of crazy sense. Damn, I wish you would consider graduate school and not let your seniior year be the end of this relationship–which isn’t a relationship at all, but….
(I did finally get to order the shirt. Tenacity rules!)
August 27th, 2008 at 7:56 am
Just. Simply. Brilliant. And i have never slept well either. But we could find other things to do in bed, if The At-Tony didn’t mind.
August 27th, 2008 at 8:48 am
PS The At-Tony could always join in….