« Best Friday
Sleepless In The Smokies »

Deconstructing Easter

deconeaster.jpg

People often debate over what eggs and rabbits have to do with Easter. The general consensus is that is a merging of the Biblical account of the death of Christ and Pagan fertility celebrations.

But, it is (perhaps) much simpler than that.

It was no secret that Jesus had a magic trick or two up his voluminous flowing sleeve. (He liked to call them miracles. But, then, so does David Blaine.)

There was the healing the blind. The turning water to wine. Impressive stuff. The only way he could top that and retain his title as the Hebrew Houdini would be the greatest disappearing act ever.

“For my next trick, I will need common household vinegar, food coloring, and an oxygen tank.”

So, they roll the stone aside on that Sunday morning, and no Jesus. (If it isn’t a trick and you really mean to entomb somebody, do you open the door?)

A baking cake may not rise if you open the oven door, but Jesus did.

Instead, out pops a rabbit with colored eggs. (Magicians and rabbits…coincidence or precedence?)

One egg for each disciple. (And you wonder why eggs come in dozens. It’s not like they come out of chickens that way.).

Yes. Jesus had forgiven them and dyed for their (our) sins.

NOTE: One egg was still white. It had denied him. And another did not cook through. It had betrayed him.

NOTE #2:  To Jay: Of course he appeared for a year afterward.  He had to take his bows. You never heard of holy men taking their bows?

DISCLAIMER: This is humor and is not meant as a judgment or comment on any-one’s religious beliefs or dis-beliefs. Hopefully it is taken in that spirit and I have not offended anyone. I hate that I feel like I have to put a disclaimer on humor, as I like to think most people are smarter than that. And most probably are. But for the few who may not be, no harm intended. Whether you are Christian, Jewish, Muslim, or Sleestak, I hope you have a wonderful Sunday with family and or friends.

This entry was posted on Sunday, March 23rd, 2008 at 7:52 am and is filed under holiday, humor. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

6 Responses to “Deconstructing Easter”

  1. Jay Says:
    March 23rd, 2008 at 10:47 am

    Not sleestak, though. heh It was humorous, but he appeared for up to a year after his resurrection. I saw the humor. I wasn’t offended…much. LOL Happy Easter, Tony.

  2. Daryl Says:
    March 23rd, 2008 at 12:01 pm

    No offense taken, I LOL’d. I love reading your blog, keep it up (in more ways than one). Happy Easter.

  3. Curtis Says:
    March 23rd, 2008 at 2:43 pm

    I love your silliness, but how do you explain marshmallow peeps?!? I wasn’t offended at all and I doubt that God would be either. After all, He created the duck billed platypus so you know He’s a prankster!

    Happy Easter, Tony.

  4. irisgirl Says:
    March 24th, 2008 at 11:18 am

    Your pun-ishing humor is egg-actly what peep-le need in these hare-ied times. We need a little yolk-ing around to keep us from becoming basket cases! Shell I continue?

    I hop-pen to think your blog’s sweet sarcasm helps me rise above my usual lamb-entations, chick my troubles at the door, and start the day by
    crack-ing a smile!

  5. brettcajun Says:
    March 24th, 2008 at 11:30 am

    You shouldn’t have to put up a disclaimer. Fuck the PC police! The only thing they are good for is destroying your personality. Remember: I refuse to BEND. You should try and not bend over so much for the sake of “political correctness”. It just seems wimpy.

    And yes… you knew payback was coming from your comment last week. ;)

  6. Chad Says:
    March 25th, 2008 at 4:59 pm

    I agree with Brett. Fuck those stupid clods who are too idiotic to have a sense of humor. The only thing I found offensive was your disclaimer. Political correctness sucks. It’s for incredibly stupid, touchy feely people who can’t think like grown-ups.

Leave a Reply