Classic White
They say clothes make the man. In other words, you can effect somebody’s impression of you by what you wear.
But, that’s just an impression. You can change that impression as easily as you change clothes.
Take your favorite article of clothing. That tells somebody really what you are. I guess that’s because your favorite clothing becomes such a part of you. Whether loose-fitting or tight, it’s your second skin. It takes your shape. It takes your smell (no matter how much you wash it, your essence is deep in the fibers). You may as well be naked.
No matter how Charlie Brown is dressed, he’s still a yellow shirt with a sharp zig-zag graphic: clearly defined whishy-washyness.
This weekend, while watching the Tennessee football game on TV, the attorney and I took care of his folding his laundry. (Yes, the game was that bad).
Now, I hate to fold laundry. The only thing I hate more than folding it is ironing it.
Given my obsession with order, you probably are surprised to hear that. But my obsession with order exactly the reason that I hate it. Because I can never fold well enough to satisfy that obsession and I just end up frustrated. Most men just don’t have the folding gene. Women can fold anything and make it look like it just came out of a package. My kingdom for a man who can fold a fitted sheet.
The attorney is better at it than I am, but he still can’t do it like a woman. And he knows it because he’s even more obsessed with order and neatness than I am. So, he satisfies his obsession by having his cleaning lady do his sheets and towels.
And most of his clothes (suits, dress shirts, nice casual clothes, etc.) are done professionally, so they come back as neat as can be.
But his underpants, t-shirts, socks, jeans, and gym stuff, he handles.
Which gets me back to my point.
To be fair, I didn’t do much folding because my primary task was to put stuff from the cleaners in the closets. So, there he was in his classic white t-shirt (with the v-neck) folding a good-sized stack of classic white t-shirts while I unwrapped the death plastic from each medium-starched white dress shirts before hanging them on the rack in their proper place, right between the white dress shirts and the white dress shirts.
That’s when it dawned on me. The attorney is a classic white shirt. More specifically, a classic white dress shirt.
Never flashy. Never calls attention. Yet, an invaluable item that you can always count on.
That’s the attorney.
Clean, crisp, and a little starched. (He has the posture of a nutcracker…push the back of his head and the jaw drops pretty good ,too. 
)
But the important thing about a white dress shirt is that as long as you treat it with care, you really only need one.
October 23rd, 2007 at 3:28 am
As long as you’re commenting on symbolism and traditions… you do realize, don’t you, that traditionally, once you’ve handled a man’s “things” (as opposed to his “thing”) you’ve got to marry, because no decent self-respecting man would EVER marry someone who’d handled someone else’s unmentionables.
Jake will be so disappointed. I’ll be glad to help him drown his sorrows, though.
October 23rd, 2007 at 3:49 am
You have quite the imagination. And such a quaint way of telling us what you’re imagining. I guess that’s why I keep coming back.
October 23rd, 2007 at 8:30 am
I’m glad that you’ve found your white shirt, Tony. I think that many of us are distracted by the brighter colored shirts and the ones with the flashy, trendy designs; but when it comes down to it, all we really want is a chance to be with our white-shirt-guy. Reliability is something that is hard to come by, hopefully we each have the perspective to realize so sensitively when we’ve found ours - it seems you certainly have.
October 23rd, 2007 at 10:45 am
i can fold a fitted sheet!
the nutcracker image is priceless!
October 23rd, 2007 at 10:48 am
Fashions come and fashions go, but you can always count on a classic because they never go out of style.
October 23rd, 2007 at 1:03 pm
I see myself as a oxford cloth, buttoned down shirt - heavily starched - white. I have a dozen of them lined up waiting to be buttoned up. I am often considered unbending and stuffed. Not sure how I can be both. But face to face…
October 23rd, 2007 at 7:43 pm
You are a true romantic. How can your attorneyNOT literally and figuratively just eat you up? But I guess he does. If he doesn’t or he stops before you want him to (if ever), he’s a fool.
Focusing on him and his wardrobe, rather than the football game - - this is gettimg serious.
October 23rd, 2007 at 11:08 pm
I can fold a fitted sheet so perfectly I’ve had women in the laundromat gather around in awe. (And not just fitted sheets. Towels, t-shirts, the whole kit ands kaboodle.) S eriously. I even had a couple ask me if I would show them how to do it like I did. (And one who, knowing a good thing when she saw it, asked if I would consider contracting out.) I can’t help it really, it’s a talent I was born with. thank god my mom never found out till I’d moved away from home or I would have been stuck with that chore for all my teen years.
I wonder what artilce of clothing I would be? I can’t picture it — it really takes someone else’s perception to call it.
October 24th, 2007 at 11:43 am
Tony,
Another very respectable post. I am very happy for you and wish you continued happiness. Although I have never met you personally (and I only live down here in Cleveland), I think you are one of those swell kind of guys that would be a good buddy. I would enjoy hanging out with you and the attorney. Thanks for sharing your happy thoughts.
October 24th, 2007 at 11:56 pm
Folding sucks. Laundry sucks. It sucks less when you’re not doing it alone. I don’t live with Rick. 11 years now. There’s always one day a week when he’s here that I have a load in the wash. He helps me with it. It goes quick. Not as quick as I like because he still gives me lessons. After 11 years I don’t have it right. He does though. My blessing.
October 25th, 2007 at 6:15 am
Awesome imagery LT… I’m curious what article of clothing you are… I know you’re a wife beater guy (HNT this week) but I see you as a plain cotton T-Shirt… casual comfort, feels natural and great next to skin… Looks good with shorts and jeans, or you can can dress it up… The best part, it looks really good under a classic whit dress shirt…
Love
SYN
October 26th, 2007 at 11:40 am
GREAT TOPIC!!!! The insight into your everyday lives is classic.
Tell the attourney that having the undies laundered is def. a NY’er thing and I couldn’t live otherwise, but just the thought of you both pitching in to get it put away is really really, cute.
Keep your chins up.
October 30th, 2007 at 5:45 am
That was the sweetest metaphor ever
Though the nutcracker bit was a bit tart