LARGETONY Blog

I get asked a lot what kind of guys I like. I never have a good answer to that question because I really don’t have a type. I like all kinds of guys. I don’t have preferences according to height, weight, hair color, race, any of that stuff. It really just depends on the guy. So I’m starting this little experiment. Since Wednesday is “Hump Day,” once a week I’ll post a picture of a guy that, given the opportunity, I would definitely hump. By the end of the year, I’ll see if there is a pattern that defines my “type.” This, of course, is done all in the name of science. NOTE: For more thorough research, click on the image.

One of my unspoken rules of Hump Day was that I would not use celebrities as case studies. But then ,if you fuck somebody on a daily basis, they sort of lose celebrity in your eyes, right? I do Jake every day. Sometimes several times a day. And since he’s a daily hump (even if only in my mind), it’s only natural that he be my Christmas hump.

Santa baby, I’ve been an awfully good boy, so bring me some Jake so I can be an awfully bad boy. There’s no question that if I had the opportunity, I’d tear into that Christmas present like a homeless man with a bucket of two-day old extra-crispy in the dumpster outside the KFC. It would be endless re-takes of the tent scene from Brokeback Mountain where I’m Heath Ledger…only bigger. It would be like digging to China. I’d go so deep that I wouldn’t be surprised to come (cum) out the other the side.

See all that smoke in the background? That’s the fire burning at the core. Where the Magnum hits the magma. Well, sometimes you gotta fight fire with fire. So, looks like I’m gonna need to fight magma with a bit of lava.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, December 20th, 2006 at 11:51 pm and is filed under hump day, just jake. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.