LARGETONY Blog

I get asked a lot what kind of guys I like. I never have a good answer to that question because I really don’t have a type. I like all kinds of guys. I don’t have preferences according to height, weight, hair color, race, any of that stuff. It really just depends on the guy. So I’m starting this little experiment. Since Wednesday is “Hump Day,” once a week I’ll post a picture of a guy that, given the opportunity, I would definitely hump. By the end of the year, I’ll see if there is a pattern that defines my “type.” This, of course, is done all in the name of science. NOTE: For more thorough research, click on the image.

Boys in cars. That’s the name of a movie, isn’t it? I wouldn’t mind acting out a few scenes with this guy. We could call our version “In Boys In Cars.”

I don’t know what it is about pictures of guys half naked in cars that sparks my plug. Maybe it’s because the type of car you have is sort of a representation (or maybe an indication) of masculinity. Or maybe it’s because I have had sex in cars…a lot…and on cars. (Sequel: “Boys On The Hood.”)

The great thing about car sex is that it’s nothing fancy. It can happen almost anywhere at almost anytime. Anywhere a car can go, you can, too. Only deeper. You’d be surprised how well a guy can hide his head under the steering wheel when he goes deep enough. (Just gotta be careful of sudden stops.)

This guy is the embodiment of the four-wheel fuck. Nothing fancy. No frills. Intense, maybe a little rough, and plenty of thrills. But no frills. A good basic hump.

Sure, he’s looks like he’s barely old enough to be driving driven. But, the Buick often becomes the boudior when you’re young. It’s where a lot have their first time. And as long as he’s got a learner’s permit, he can ride with be ridden by a responsible driver. He needs to be taught about merging, shifting, parking, and overdrive. We experienced driver’s owe it to the younger ones to pass on our knowledge. What the saying? “Power-fucking is knowledge?” Something like that.

I need to get a big old station wagon or something and drive around spreading knowledge by spreading cheeks. It could be sort of like the book-mobile. Except you get to keep whatever you check out.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, July 12th, 2006 at 1:48 am and is filed under hump day. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.