LARGETONY Blog

You know when you try to pass a big one? A really big one. And it’s like a unmovable force (or is it immovable?). No matter how you change your position, apply pressure, pinch, grunt, or groan, you can’t get rid of it. You know any people like that? I do. I’m sure you do, too. We all have people in our lives who are just like pieces of shit. Real turds.

I have talked before about a guy at work who hates me. From the moment he met me. Never liked me. Never will. To this day, I still don’t know why. But he does. I admit I don’t care all that much about him either. Not cause he doesn’t like me. (There’s always going to be somebody who doesn’t like you.) But, because, just like a a big compacted wad of feces, he’s a pain in my ass.

Even after the initial struggle with people like this, when you finally get them out of your system, they still linger. You think you’re all done with them. Sure, there may be a bit of back(sp)lash, particularly if the conflict had been a forceful or explosive one. But the calm and relaxation you feel afterwards far outweighs annoying little clean ups.

You are free of that particular business, and can go about your business. So you think. Every once in a while you run into the one that insists on sticking around. There’s been other people you’ve been able to flush away like magic. But, this is the big turd. The one that swirls around and just as it disappears, it coughs itself back up like a synchronized swimmer going for artistic merit.

You try again and you try again. And the turd just comes floating back. You know better than to let it frustrate you so much. It’s just a turd. But it does get the best of you. And the longer it lingers the more likely you are to give up on the the gentle flush and go for more force.

So a word to the turds of the world. You floaters. Just head on downstream before somebody finds something to bust you up with. Take some pride in leaving whole. Being a big turd isn’t the best thing, I know. But keep in mind, nobody likes a little shit.

This entry was posted on Friday, June 16th, 2006 at 6:37 pm and is filed under rants. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.