Hump Day, Week 14
I get asked a lot what kind of guys I like. I never have a good answer to that question because I really don’t have a type. I like all kinds of guys. I don’t have preferences according to height, weight, hair color, race, any of that stuff. It really just depends on the guy. So I’m starting this little experiment. Since Wednesday is “Hump Day,” once a week I’ll post a picture of a guy that, given the opportunity, I would definitely hump. By the end of the year, I’ll see if there is a pattern that defines my “type.” This, of course, is done all in the name of science. NOTE: For more thorough research, click on the image.
I like this guy for his smile. Yeah, he’s nice and leggy, and has a great chest, but I keep going back to his smile. His toothy, gummy smile. It’s not like it’s a particularly pretty smile. In fact, it’s sort of a goofy smile. But it’s a smile that says that he likes to have a good time. And isn’t having a good time what humping is all about? I mean, if you aren’t willing to cut loose and have some fun, then you may as well put your britches back on (and drive careful on your way home.) This is the kind of guy that I know I could be playful with and do something stupid like walk up and drop my pecker in the middle of the pages he’s reading, like a big fleshy bookmark. Sort of a signal to let him know the fun is about to begin. I like a guy who can appreciate the goofiness of something like that and not expect sexual signals to always be about smoldering glances and seductive caressess. Sure I want a fella who’ll start purring like Tom cat when I snuggle up and start rubbing his ass. But I also want him to be a guy who when he sits down to dinner and finds an imprint of my junk in his mashed potatoes can just throw his head back and laugh. And I’ll take that as my signal to throw his head back and…well, you know. That’s why the spikey hair works on this one, too. The spikes make good handles.
April 5th, 2006 at 9:41 am
Big fleshy bookmark?! But you’d stain the book!
Paul
April 5th, 2006 at 10:28 am
That’s gonna be a big pile of mashed potatoes! I love it that you can be so playful about sex. People take all aspects of life way too seriously, in my humble opinion.
April 5th, 2006 at 5:12 pm
I SO agree with the smile part… and the chest and the legs and your big fleshy bookmark…
But I figure, after a night with you, it would be hard to concentrate the entire “safe drive home”!
April 6th, 2006 at 5:38 am
Very cute guy this week; I’m liking.
So…
you’ve had a hard day, you get home,
you want some bloody peace, you try to read a book…
Imagine… (if one were able to continue reading the book it would be fine but…)
Having slammed the book shut and left him writhing on the floor you politely offer to call a medic.
Later.
Dinner is served!
“imprint”?
Picture that. No really. Do.
Imagine if you were so NOT IN THE MOOD and so close to sharp utensils?
April 6th, 2006 at 9:36 am
I guess that would be the Tennessee version of the English dinner ‘Bangers and Mash’! I don’t think I’ll ever look at a plate of mashed potatoes quite in the same way again
April 6th, 2006 at 5:27 pm
You would know how I love my mashed potatoes. Now that would add a new twist! melted butter and a dash of cock..hmmmm
April 6th, 2006 at 6:55 pm
I think I will add “Large Tony’s Mashed Potatoes” to the next church fundraiser cookbook.
April 7th, 2006 at 12:45 am
food sex….for some reason that’s making me giggle right now….
April 7th, 2006 at 6:33 am
I think we’re going to need some extra gravy to fill up that potato well.
April 7th, 2006 at 1:24 pm
Everyone beat me to the good lines but suddenly I have the urge to read while eating a bowl of mashed taters….could someone pass the butter?
April 9th, 2006 at 6:41 pm
But I also want him to be a guy who when he sits down to dinner and finds an imprint of my junk in his mashed potatoes can just throw his head back and laugh.
*
Wait, you work in food service? I thought you were a painter…
April 9th, 2006 at 11:08 pm
tony :: thanks for your comments about b.g.b. it’s a great site and one that i hope will stay around awhile.