LARGETONY Blog

Somebody asked me today what was on my Christmas list. I told her that I don’t have a Christmas list because I don’t really get presents. She gave me a look like she thought I was the most pitiful thing she had ever seen. Think malnourished three-legged puppy shivering from a fall into a frozen [...]

I heard a food expert on TV or the radio once talk bout how humans are the only creatures who eat not only for nourishment, but also for pleasure. That’s why we do things like season food and combine interesting flavors. Otherwise, we would just tear meat off an animal, or yank vegetation out of [...]

You ever considered how picking out a Christmas tree has similarities to cruising for dick? There you are, checking out the ranks, on the hunt for that perfect specimen: a big, thick, sturdy one that you think just might hit the ceiling. Be careful how you handle it in your fists or your hands might [...]

You always see it in books and movies. Some young mother somewhere gives birth not realizing that the blessed event will ultimately lead to some conflict, battle, or war. Think “Harry Potter.” Think “Star Wars,” Think New Testament. But “Harry Potter” and “Star Wars” have endings…or at least will eventually. But for more the two [...]

So, yesterday afternoon I had to go to one of my least favorite places in the world: Wal-Mart. Why do I go, if I don’t like it? Well, unfortunately they are cheaper than many places and they are one-stop. I hate shopping of any kind, so anything that keeps me from going to several stores [...]

December is here and Christmas is just around the corner. In honor of the season I’m going to attempt a series of posts with Christmas holiday themes. My first idea was to do a post a day up until December 25. Sort of like a written advent calendar. But twenty five posts without missing a [...]