New and Improved
So, I was at a hardware store, a week or so ago, and I was watching a guy. Not so strange, right? I watch guys a lot. (They don’t know it, but I do.) But, in watching this guy, I caught myself doing something I don’t normally do. No, I wasn’t breathing heavy and playing pocket pool because something about him toasted my loins. That’s pretty normal….sort of. I caught myself making a comparison. I wasn’t comparing him to all the various guys who populate my dreams (day, night, wet, or otherwise). I was comparing him to myself. Well, I was comparing myself to him.
Sure, I know that’s what we guys do. When it comes to attraction, we’re basically like products. Which tastes better, Coke or Pepsi? The problem is I tend to see myself more as Fanta Grape Soda. A decent enough product, but is anyone really drinking it? You see, I’m riddled with insecurity like a big city hooker with the clap. Some of you may be surprised by or not believe that, given the naughty side of my website. But you have to realize, that area is focused on a part of me where I’m confident. Wherever I fall on the scale in that regard, I’m pretty darned happy. We’re talking Coke Classic…two liter.
So, I’m looking at this guy and where I normally would have thought to myself, “I wish I had arms as good as his,” this time I was thinking “I wonder of my arms are as good as his.” To most of you there is probably no difference in those statements. But for me, it was a big fat light bulb. So big you could screw it into a lighthouse. The fact that I feel like my arms are good enough to even make a comparison means I have taken a healthy step forward in dealing with my insecurities. Maybe Fanta is as good as Coke.
Most of my insecurities stem from physical appearance. Some things, like my face, are what they are. But a few years ago, I figured could maybe make a change in my body. It’s been gradual, but reasonably regular efforts at working out and a metabolism change that arrived on my doorstep the moment I turned thirty (God sent that one FedEx) has finally allowed me to put some meat on my once skinny frame. A new and improved Fanta. (You’ve seen the commericals…”Fanta, Fanta, Wanta Fanta?”) .
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not suddenly all into myself and strutting around. (Or even dancing in gogo boots and a neon colored bikini). But I think I can at least start to position myself with the Cokes: Diet Coke (guys with5% bodyfat); Cherry Coke (virgins); New Coke (guys with plastic surgery…new, but not necessarily improved); Vanilla Coke (handjobs only); Coke Classic (daddies) and Sprite (twinks…lightweight and bubbly). After all, Fanta is made by the Coca-Cola company.
Even “New and Improved,” Fanta isn’t going to appeal to the masses. But that’s okay, I’d rather a guy pick a Fanta cause he “Wanta Fanta.”
October 17th, 2005 at 12:25 am
Coke is fine, but Fanta is good — damn good!
October 17th, 2005 at 12:31 am
Oh yeah, and that pic? That’s a “right click keeper” that is!
October 17th, 2005 at 2:54 am
But you know, over here in Europe, Fanta is much bigger than Coke!
You should come live here
October 17th, 2005 at 4:36 am
Hey Tony…
A friend of mine (Camper English) made fun of me recently because I ran into a liquor store to get some Cacahuates (Mexican roasted peanuts in a pastry shell) and Grape Fanta.
I ate the cacahuates and drank the Fanta while waiting for the 22 Fillmore bus (one of the most ghetto in the city of San Francisco) and I still didn’t care.
You are an individual. Don’t ever forget that.
BTW…if you were any hotter in your latest pic, my nipples would rip through my shirt and “boing” right through my shirt.
I’m just sayin. Ya know?
October 17th, 2005 at 7:51 am
Ever since I first read your blog I was thinking, hmm I Wanta Fanta. I’ve thought you were attractive the first time I saw your picture and read your posts. Truth be told, I haven’t even seen the other site! You are beautiful inside and out, and that in the end it was counts the most.:-)
October 17th, 2005 at 8:03 am
Keep your book full of the right words and the cover shall take care of itself.
October 17th, 2005 at 8:04 am
Hey buddy,
I just love your blog, and I will say like most guys here Fanta is better then the rest. I think you’re a great guy not because of part of your name sake, but because you seem just like a regular guy. Not the typical gay guy. I think you look great aned keep up the good work man.
October 17th, 2005 at 8:55 am
Hey Tony,
I know of nobody, and I don’t care who you are, that doesn’t suffer from a little insecuity at times. And if you claim you haven’t your head is probably to inflated to have any fun with. Keep up the good work and don’t be too hard on the “comparisons” If we all did comparisons on the rest of your parts we wouldn’t have the courage to ask you out either??
October 17th, 2005 at 9:15 am
Those Coke analogies are hilarious! Thanks to you I can now properly identify myself as a Coke Classic who wishes he could go back to being a Diet. (In LA we have Diet Coke w/ Lime - thats my fave.)
Now I’m never gonna be able to sit through that movie-trailer Fantanas commercial without imagining you as the purple one. Frightening.
October 17th, 2005 at 9:43 am
Now does that come in a can or abottle? Whatever, I know it could come in a Zeke if it wanted to
October 17th, 2005 at 10:45 am
Hey Tony,
Awesome analogy. I can totally relate to what you are saying and I am happy you are feeling more confortable with yourself. Everyone has those stages in their life.
As for not knowing you are good looking and have a nice bod, ever considered glasses or cleaning the mirrors? Just kidding. What is more important and I think others will agree, is that you are even more beautiful on the inside. Hope you see it too.
October 17th, 2005 at 12:14 pm
Ditto everything tonybits said…plus understand that our unique arms, faces, bodies, bubbles, sweetness, can design, and color are what makes all people thirsty for something…
October 17th, 2005 at 1:21 pm
Man, I’m glad that you’re grape soda. And that there’s orange and fruit punch and all those Coke variations as well.
It sure would be boring as hell if we only had one soft drink to choose from.
I myself am Coke Classic and damn proud of it. But I’m glad there’s Fresca, and Dry Grape Ginger Ale, and Cel-Ray Tonic and even Jarrito’s available to anyone who wants some.
October 17th, 2005 at 1:36 pm
Didn’t Fanta make a black cherry soda also. I seem to remember black cherry. But I grew up drinking RC cola and no one drinks that anymore (except for me when I can find it). By the way……..your guns are fine! And that pic is WOOFY! Too bad we’d fight/wrestle over position. LOL
October 17th, 2005 at 7:32 pm
fanta grape must be deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-licious!
October 17th, 2005 at 8:29 pm
I think maybe you’ve just increased the sales of Fanta Grape soda so I’m gonna go out and buy me some Fanta stock!! Has anyone told you that you’re some ‘tall drink of water’? Water…Fanta Grape…either one would taste great coming off that that body!!
October 17th, 2005 at 8:33 pm
Hee Hee - love the post! Awww, I’m a Cherry Coke. Cute play on words. Have a day!
October 17th, 2005 at 8:54 pm
BARTENDER,,,,Give me a Grape Fanta with ice,,,,Hold the straw
October 17th, 2005 at 10:59 pm
I was never much into coke, actually…
October 18th, 2005 at 1:28 am
I think I’m more like diet root beer… light and bubbly like Sprite, skinny like Diet, but with a sexy dark color and *ahem* taste that EVERYONE loves! Add some ice cream and you’ve got the perfect treat!
Yet another great post, big guy! Way to go on the exercise regimen- you’ve got some guns! Good luck and keep it up (hard & otherwise)!!
October 18th, 2005 at 5:19 pm
I wonder why we spend so much time feeling insecure? I have the same problem, I guess this is what women feel too. Anyways, you are a delicious Fanta cream soda, I think.
October 19th, 2005 at 12:50 pm
wondering if you might have interest in some Gatorade… fierce grape (is it in ya?)
October 20th, 2005 at 12:28 am
Sweetness you slay me. I look at you and think, this guy is so hot, so together, so deeply connected to who he is. Then you post this little gem and I see this warm, slightly insecure guy who would just as easily embarrass himself in a tight situation as I would. You make me smile with your charm and accessible nature. There’s not one fucking thing that needs improvement dear boy.
k
October 20th, 2005 at 2:07 am
Wel all have insecurities. I used to be so skinny I could put my hand around my bicep and touch my fingers together. Even today, I sometimes forget that I’m not that same freakishly skinny guy anymore.
Funny story…After working out for a few years, my best friend caught me in the mirror once saying “yeah, I’d do me!” That’s when I realized I wasn’t skrawny anymore. *G* (and he still teases me about it.)
October 20th, 2005 at 7:03 am
Nothing you are saying here is surprising, my boy. Everyone’s a little (or a lot) insecure, compares themselves to others at times and wishes for what’s on the other side, but then wants the opportunity to change back if what they get isn’t as good as what they had. NORMAL. I guess. You ain’t uber-strange or anything. As far as the Coke-analogies - fuhgettaboutit! The funniest shit I’ve ever heard.
October 21st, 2005 at 12:49 pm
Good to know EVERYBODY’S insecure….,
October 23rd, 2005 at 12:09 am
Don’t know about you but from over here, the fanta is looking damned hot
Paul
October 24th, 2005 at 8:24 am
hey there. I have wanted to look at your blog for quite a while as i see you on a lot of blogrolls of blogs I read. I usually read at work thought and you are blovked for some reason.
Anyway, today i finally remembered to look and I just wanted to say what a total hottie you are! I will definitely be back!
November 26th, 2005 at 6:32 am
I think you have every right to make comparisons… from the look of that shot!