C-Day
It’s Valentine’s Day. V-Day. Couples near and far will spend romantic moments canoodling, snogging, sucking and fucking. Gay, straight, lesbian, and otherwise, all wrapped up in sensual bliss. V-Day.
Then there are us single people: either spending the day alone in a hot pink confection of self-pity; cruising the gutters for anything with a heartbeat in defiance of the day; or trying to ignore the whole thing by hanging out with our equally lonesome friends pretending we don’t have a giant “L” on our foreheads. L-Day.
At lastly, there has been a growing trend among feminists, lesbians, and whipped men over the last several years to take the “alentine” out of the day and replace it with “agina,” and celebrate by attending performances of “The Vagina Monologues.” Judging by what you can read in the press, that play has become “The Christmas Carol” of February 14. Practically a holiday favorite. I wouldn’t doubt that in a few short years, there will be television specials devoted to the new kind of “V-Day.” Like “It’s the Great Vagina, Charlie Brown,” and one of those animated clay programs with Sharon Stone as the voice of Regina the Vagina. And like most other Western traditions, the gay guys are left out. It’s time for a play celebrating our junk. Dick is just as good as pussy. Check that. Dick is better than pussy. There’s already been a D-Day. We need a C-Day.
So, fairies and gentlemen, (dim the lights) without futher ado, (drum roll, please) LargeTony presents an excerpt from “The Mancockalogues”:
Cock.
Say it loud. Say it proud. Cock.
I love my Cock. I love other Cocks.
Some Cocks are sweet gerkins. Some Cocks are jumbo dills.
My Cock is the prize cucumber at the county fair.
Some Cocks are sleeveless. Some cocks wear a hood.
My cock wears a mock turtleneck.
Cock.
Say it loud. Say it proud. Cock.
Some cocks are saplings. Some Cocks are mighty oaks.
My Cock is a Giant Sequoyah.
Some Cocks point left or right. Some Cocks point up or down.
My Cock points the way.
Some Cocks are midnight snacks. Some Cocks are gourmet feasts.
My Cock is comfort food.
Cock.
Say it loud. Say it proud. Cock.
If my Cock were on the playground, it would be the slide.
If my Cock was a sign, it would read “Oversized Load”
If my Cock were a national landmark, it would be Old Faithful
If my Cock were furniture, it would be a loveseat.
If my Cock was a car, it would be a Hummer.
Cock.
Say it loud. Say it proud. Cock.
My Cock is Christmas, Birthday, and New Year’s in one.
My Cock is DisneyWorld
My Cock is the Declaration of Independence
My Cock is the QEII
My Cock is Niagra Falls, the Smokey Mountains, and Mount St. Helens.
My Cock is the Powerball
My Cock is fine Italian Marble and precious gold.
My Cock is the Hope Diamond.
Cock.
Say it loud. Say it proud. Cock.
My Cock.
My Cock is friendly, attentive, demanding.
My Cock is juicy, succulent, sweet, filling.
My Cock is pendulous, heavy, expandable, thick.
My Cock is high protein, low carb, low fat.
Cock.
Say it loud. Say it proud. Cock.
Some Cocks are too big. Some Cocks are too small.
My Cock is just right.
Cock.
Say it loud. Say it proud.
C - Caress…
O- Obsess…
C- Coax…
K- Know…
COCK!
February 14th, 2005 at 1:22 pm
Oh. My. God.
That’s all I got to say, yo!
February 14th, 2005 at 1:58 pm
I had to read this post while at work…..
February 14th, 2005 at 2:38 pm
Woohoo!
February 14th, 2005 at 5:38 pm
That is the best rap I’ve heard in a long time. Great photo, too.
February 15th, 2005 at 3:04 am
I thought I was the only one who was that in love w/his own cock! *G* great remake!
February 15th, 2005 at 4:03 pm
i’m not tall enuf for that ride.
February 18th, 2005 at 5:46 pm
Uh, yeah…I think I love your cock as much as you do! Grrrrr, Tony!
February 20th, 2005 at 11:18 pm
Can we see your cock without the shirt??? shooting, perhaps
March 4th, 2005 at 12:15 pm
God man i love huge cocks too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’d like to see it shooting and without the wet shirt!!!
March 5th, 2005 at 9:21 am
For singles, I think of Valentine’s Day as “Single Awareness Day.”
November 18th, 2006 at 1:00 pm
Awesome…I liked it…And not to mention that is a damn nice cock…I’d like to see it nude…yum…spank me with it and cram it in my face…id like to have that under the christmas tree
January 31st, 2007 at 4:41 am
All i can say is wow.
March 22nd, 2007 at 2:08 pm
Great WoW!!!!!
March 29th, 2007 at 10:53 pm
push my pussy!
March 29th, 2007 at 10:54 pm
wow i love your cock!
March 30th, 2007 at 1:45 am
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…………………….. yummy dick!!! my crotch’s getting wet… pump me up!!!
March 30th, 2007 at 1:49 am
oh yeah!!!!! i want that cock hit me inside from the back!!!
March 30th, 2007 at 10:25 pm
8 inches?
April 3rd, 2007 at 9:28 am
Mine’s more of a ‘cornichon’ but I love it too . . . especially since it’s come roaring back to life afte a six year hiatus. Recovery from18 months in the hospital is an invigorating struggle Never undrestimate the side effects of prescription drugs in their ability to wreak havoc with your cock . . .be it gherkin or looong European cuke.
April 3rd, 2007 at 9:30 am
I forgot to say you sounded very ‘Walt Whitmanesque”. “I Sing the Cock Electric”.
July 5th, 2007 at 10:34 am
wow that cock is real small
December 16th, 2007 at 9:24 am
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December 19th, 2007 at 5:01 pm
wow he would not have to ask me twice to suck his cock and swallow hos load
December 20th, 2007 at 1:24 pm
wow i would love to suck that cock and swallow his big hot creamy load
December 20th, 2007 at 3:49 pm
WOW i would pay to suck that cock and i would like to run my lips all over the head of his cock kissing and licking it till he blow his big hot cum load in my mouth 4 me to swallow
December 22nd, 2007 at 4:10 pm
i have got my boyfriends cock in my mouth now i wish it was that cock instead i love this cock so much i would rather have that in my nice pink pussy than my boyfriends big black one
December 22nd, 2007 at 4:13 pm
by the way my boyfriend has just cum in my mouth and i have swallowed it all if they are any well hung guy out there that like there cock sucked and there cum swallowed by sexy blonde send me a message
January 2nd, 2008 at 1:12 pm
WOW that cock makes my pussy so wet i am fingering myself dreaming that cock was in my mouth 4 me to suck and to swallow his big load of tasty SPUNK then i would love him to take me up the ass
January 27th, 2008 at 12:47 pm
if some females wanna suck a big cock i am here.i am serious. add me msn clit-licker-69@hotmail.com
April 13th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
Want to see my cock? kanglim5500@gmail.com